Smokers.

I won't be quiting until the end of the summer, I'm not going to say to anyone that I'm 'cutting down' because we all know that we never stick to that.

I was reading up on quiting. Did you know people go to get hypnotised into believing they're not addicted and walk away smoke free? Apparently the success rates are amazing, hypnotherapy is 300% more successful than nicotine replacement therapies and 500% more successful than methods that are based purely on willpower alone, going 'cold turkey'. That's alot of quitters. Over all, this method has roughly a 66% success rate. That's not alot when you think about it, but it's far better than any other method.

This sounds like a way of quitting that I'd definately look into if I was thinking of stopping any time soon. Because this method uses absolutely no drugs what so ever, it's completely safe! People that have had the hypnosis say that the experience was "pleasant", how can you say no to this?

Actually, here's a few reasons. Generally, the idea of being hypnotised is a bit scary. It'll cost you a bomb, it might not actually work, you'd need to find a good, professional hypnotherapist that you can feel comfortable with. The procedure is described like this, "The hypnotist then reprogrammes the subconscious mind through suggestions and affirmations, into breaking the desire and pleasure of smoking and redirecting it into more positive and healthy actions." They reprogramme your brain, God knows what else they might be doing in your head aswell. The fact that it'll set me back a few pennies puts me off completely.

So for those of you like minded broke folk, there's nicotine tapering! Better knows as "cutting back", attempting to smoke less each day until you are smoking none, buying smokes that have less nicotine therefor stopping the addiction. This method shows a 35% success rate after a year, whatever that means. I'm guessing what they're trying to say is that you shouldn't try this one because it makes no sense. "I'm going to stop smoking by carrying on to smoke, ending up with more carbon monoxide in my body and not actually quitting in the end."? No thanks. This one is just for those who aren't strong enough to go cold turkey, those of you who can't deal with the withdrawal symptoms! The internet says it's a fact that smokers tend to inhale twice as hard and take more puffs while trying to cut down. Also, smokers that reduce the number of cigarettes they smokeusually lose count of how many they're smoking and this can lead to an increase in the end. Unlucky for smokers, eh? Smokers will just want to smoke the few cigarettes they have more so than they did before trying to quit.

But hey, don't listen to me, I've gone cold turkey on atleast 4 seperate occasions and that didn't last more than 3 or 4 months. Statistics show that only between 5% and 10% of smokers going cold turkey actually succeed.

If you don't see yourself doing any of the suggested methods, you could always be ridiculous and try acupuncture? Then again, with a 15% success rate, the chances that the acupuncturist could be shit, the risk of getting an infection from a nasty needle and ofcourse, a big fat fee for all the trouble they went through! You have to pay them to stick needles in you, madness.

Preferabley, just don't start in the first place. Sure, it'll make you look cool, get you drunk faster and is a good social point but it'll make you smell all of the time and you'll have a lot of people nag at you a lot of the time.

I'll quit after the summer ends. Right now, I get to wear sunglasses and smoke at the same time, that gives me atleast 7 cool points.