That's Life.

That's what all the people say. Flying high in April, shot down in May.

Oh my goodness, there's got to be more to life that this. Right now all that there is is... coffee. It just seems like such a waste of time. I'm not going to end up doing anything that I've planned, I never do. Nothing ever goes to the plans I've set, really. It's all a big joke really;

"We got to that age when you discover what an appaling hoax life has been. Just a bad joke, we both agreed. End-of-the-pier-stuff. You're born, you fall in love, you suffer and then you die" - from Murder Most Fab

End of the pier stuff. I was talking to Hopper about it today actually, there were kids down staris in the Library and I was saying that they're so so cute. I don't want to have children, ever. I say it all the time. But they're just so cute and wonderful and lovely, how can you not have one? That's something I'll be missing out on if I don't get knocked up; joys of bringing up someone that is yours. I don't want to get married either, that I can live with though. But I'd like to have a wedding, that's something I really want to do; wear a big white dress and make someone really happy (assuming they;d be happy with me!). But alas, I'm letting, making myself miss out on something fantastic.

"this love foolosophy is killing previous illusions I had in my mind about you."

Life is a bit of a hoax really, if you think about it. The most depressing though I have ever had was that we go to school, primary, secondary and then further education and all for one reason; money. To get a job and earn money. How sad is that? All just for money. Really got me thinking and I didn't like that (another blonde trait that I have). Isn't a nice thought, makes me feel as if life is a waste, more so than I previously thought.

As much as I love to 'live life to the full', making my to do list and all that, this rubbish just makes me feel that there's so so much to bring us down. Responsibility being a big one, one that I'm just not going to be able to keep a grip of. Oh, life after school is going to be such a let down! As I said before, nothing will go to plan because as I've stated everywhere on every social networking page I have; I want too much.