I Understand.

Everyone has their own weaknesses, yeah? I've heard people talking about it before. I know my friends weaknesses. Some of my male friends cave in to their female friends demands, some of my female friends just let people walk all over them, alot of my friends are unhappy with their body and weight... actually, I'd say they all are. My Dads only weakness is that he wants to do nice things for my Mum but she doesn't notice.

My Mum is the only person I see that doesn't have a weakness, she is all strong. I've never seen her at a vulnerable stage in her life, I've never seen her properly cry. Three people we know died recently and my Mums dad is having a hellish time, she is still holding up this house. She is one of the strongest women I know and that's where I get my 'independance' from.

There's one thing though that she wont see as a weakness but I do; her perspective. She's very wary of the way our family is viewed by other people. She always checkes what I'm wearing, she tells me off every day before I run out of the door, shouting back to her "It's my face! I don't care, you do!".

She's why I am so horrible to men, she's why I keep myself closed off and hide behind humor, she's why I am quick to judge anyone that's not my friend, she's why I blame everyone else for my wrongs. She's why I feel like I do most of the time.
"I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes"

She's also the reason I want to prove people wrong, she's why I act outrageously and dress just as peculiar, she's why I'm trying to break the mold, she's what is pushing me forward in the world. She's the reason I dislike myself, alot.
"I am the wisest woman you've ever met
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen
And you've never met anyone
Who's as positive as I am sometimes"

One of the qualities she has given me will end up my weakness and bring me down. But I don't care because the fall will be fabulous. "I've got one hand in my pocket and the other one is flicking a cigarette", I'm living for now, and changing for absolutely no one. I haven't got life figured out just yet, but it's going to be great.

I understand that people have their weaknesses but I dont understand why they let people see them. I'm so secretive about mine that I don't even know what it is. The minute everyone knows, they will use it against you.