Back at square one, with a sort of 'will they? wont they?' horrible feeling between us. I can't ruin it again, I must be lucky that I've managed to smooth things out between us for the third time.
I'm just lucky you talk to me at all, I've watched you avoid women in Glasgow that you don't want to talk to but they want to talk to you... I'm hoping that's not the way you feel about me. I always get a horrible feeling in my stomach that that's why I hardly ever hear from you. You have a tendancy to be an idiot, alot, towards girls. You have this cocky attitude that gives off a vibe of "I don't see you as a person, merely an object in my eyes" and everyone can see that you think that way. I don't mind though because that's what this stupid feeling makes me do.
I don't want to ramble on again about 'how it was' and how I'd love for it to go back to that (because I really would) but I'd rather there was something more.
What we're lacking is communication. Something's stopping me from putting the cards on the table and just telling you whats going on, the way things are. That's only because I know you can;t do the same, because either you feel the same and aren't sure if I'm interested or because you aren't interested. But you can't be! That wouldn't make any sense! That wouldn't explain how you were acting around me today or why you came to see me just for catching up and laughs. Maybe you;re just being nice... no.
What I need to do is grow a pair and just confront you about all of this unspoken tention. Ha, 'confront' sounds so angry! Confrontational really, I'm not doing it to cause up trouble.
By the way, you smell great and you looked really smart today. Oh, and your hair is nice too.
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